Category: Grief / Healing
-
Work
Let me give you a brief rundown of my work history since the birth of Archer. November 2016 – October 2021: Worked full-time for a law firm October 2021 – January 2022: Contracted for the law firm October 2021 – March 2022: Worked full-time for a healthcare non-profit March 2022 – present: Work for my…
-
Firm Foundation
Almost every morning while we were in the hospital, Theo would go down to either the cafe or hospital Starbucks to get us coffee for the day. (The walk was quite a distance from our room, so it did take about 20 minutes to get coffee). Archer was awake most mornings, as the lab technician…
-
Exhaustion
Since our IVF consultation this week, I have felt a sense of exhaustion. No, not like I am tired and ready for bed (even though I can only sleep a few hours each night these days). I’m emotionally exhausted. Our IVF consult went really well, but then Wednesday hit. About halfway through my morning, I…
-
Emotions
This past week, Theo and I had our second summer grief session. This session was called “Bash It & Smash It”. I was hoping we got to break things to let our feelings out. However, that was not the case. Our kit arrived in the mail for the event and there was LOTS of paint.…
-
Community
When you encounter a loss, you get many calls or asked from Social Workers, doctors, and grief teams if you are doing okay. I find this to be a semi-silly question to ask. I don’t know that anyone going through grief is truly ‘okay.’ However, the second thing they ask is if you have a…
-
It’s A Date!
Tonight, we went out to a restaurant, where a friend gave us a gift card. Our dinner was fantastic! At the end of dinner, though, we realized that this was our first date night since before Archer had been in the hospital, which brought me to tears. Thinking that we would not be coming home…
-
Let’s Get Real
Lately, people tell me that they admire how strong I am or that they respect us for being strong. (Don’t get me wrong: it’s a very kind and sweet compliment). I hate to break it to you all – I’m not strong. People see the highlight real of my life right now. Sadly, even the…
-
CRACK!
Imagine that you are standing on an iced-over lake during the dead of winter. Suddenly, you hear: CRACK! You see the ice below your feet starting to crack. You stand there, and the ice breaks further. So you begin to walk towards land, a place of safety. As you do so, you see and hear…
-
Three
Three months in the womb: we announced we were expecting you.Three months of life: you had just started to roll over, move, and coo.Three months: of you not being here… Three of the most brutal months of my life have passed, and not a single day gets easier. I miss you as much as I…
-
The Start Of It All
Theo and I started talking about having kids in early 2020. We had a trip to Disney World planned over our anniversary in May, and since you cannot ride most of the rides while you are pregnant, we agreed that we would start trying after we got back from Disney. As we all know, the…